Yahoo Camgirls and Prospective Cam Sex Playmates: From the Funny to the Inexplicable
No doubt all skype and yahoo camgirls get the odd weird message online from prospective customers and cam sex playmates, but there are a few common ones I tend to receive frequently that make me think: wtf? 😀
The first are what I refer to colloquially as the ‘cock color’ guys…I’m sure all the yahoo camgirls out there have encountered variations on these dudes, the ones who ask about our preferences vis a vis cock color before we even know their name. “Hey bb, u lik (sic….did he mean to add an ‘e’ or a ‘c’?) Black/white/Asian/etc cock?” Ummmm….I like cock that’s attached to people I find enjoyable, I seem to have misplaced my cock color-coding tool that would otherwise help me determine whether said cock falls within an ideal melanin range, so I guess I’m gonna have to go back to what every other person on this planet does, which is assess attractiveness based on, call me crazy, overall attractiveness. For real, a guy could have a magnificent cock worthy of hanging in the Louvre (how’s that for a mental image) but if it’s attached to a guy who’s boring, rude or uninspired, guess what? I’m not interested. I’m pretty sure that they same for all skype and yahoo camgirls…I’ve yet to see one that wrote a profile specifying “x cock only, please” 🙂
Next are the buzzers. Nearly all the yahoo camgirls I know disable their yahoo buzz feature cuz the sound is annoying as hell, but it’s the intention behind the urge to ‘buzz’ that I find funny. Every time a guy does it I picture him knocking on someone’s door, and when the resident doesn’t answer immediately they fly into a rage and start pummeling it with their feet and fists like a two year old having a temper tantrum. I get a giggle thinking about how impatient they are, how important they clearly perceive themselves to be. As most of y’all know, when I’m available I respond, when I don’t it’s cuz I’m not. Sounds pretty straightforward, but I swear some of these guys seem to think I should bail on a skype cam sex show mid-way through to respond to their yahoo messages. Yes, they are THAT important, bb *serious face*
Last but certainly not least is my favorite type of message that I, and no doubt all yahoo camgirls receive online: the guys who are bored. I’ve seriously lost track of how many times I’ve seen a guy respond to a “hi, how are you?” with a variation on “nothing, I’m bored”. Maybe it’s my personality but I struggle to wrap my head around the concept of boredom, in all my years I don’t think I’ve ever experienced that state of mind. How could someone possible be bored, have they read every book written, listened to every good track ever created, thought every good thought to be had? (scritched every kitten screaming for pets?).
Truth is, I don’t think I know a single interesting person who’s ever been bored. Probably the closest I’ve ever come to being bored was in my first year of my first undergrad, when I made the mistake of signing up for a class with a professor that made Thatcher look like a bleeding heart. I recall one day sitting through a lecture on why First Nations, Second Thoughts should be considered a piece of legitimate academic literature instead of a bullshit paean to colonialism worthy of lining a cat box, but I just escaped to the interesting thoughts inside my head until it was over…isn’t that what most people do?
So yeah, on my personal list of things that make yahoo camgirls say “what the fuck?”, these three above are my personal favs. I’m actually far too amused by them than I probably should be, but I don’t see the harm in getting a harmless giggle out of the actions/words of those who aren’t nearly as unique as they perceive themselves to be. To the rest of y’all, the vast majority of y’all who grant me the pleasure of seeing you as a unique and extraordinary individuals rather than a type, thanks for that. You’re the reason we yahoo camgirls adore our jobs and keep logging back in <3
Peace and Love,
Jesse